Jonni Kuest
Host of Top 5 at Five
Jonni Kuest has hosted 162 Episodes.
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42: Don’t Take the President’s Drugs, Harvard Did What?, The Gronk is Back & More
April 22nd, 2020 | 11 mins 4 secs
HUMP DAY! In this one we talk about Harvard and other colleges getting unnecessary aid; The President’s recommendation for taking drugs was wrong, big surprise; Abigail don’t play that and yelled at Disney again; Georgia wants you to risk your life so you can get your hair did; and the Gronk leaves retirement to join Tom Brady in TB.
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41: WTF is HBO Max, ARODJLOMetros, In Other Bigotted News & more
April 21st, 2020 | 11 mins 18 secs
Thanks for the ones. The real ones. You know who you are. This goes out to you, you, my number one...So in this one, we talking about the Trumpito immigration ban; We find out the Senate is capable of making deals; SpaceX is finally going to the ISS with other people; AT&T has more info on HBO Max and I attempt to explain it; and Alex Rodriguez and Jennifer Lopez are apparently seriously tryna buy the Mets. Who woulda thunk it? Plus Tiger Man!
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40: Happy 4:20 Y’allllllll
April 20th, 2020 | 7 mins 14 secs
Hey. It’s Monday. But it’s also 4/20. So there was stuff about oil in the news. And something about Walmart selling Vudu I think. But nobody reads this anyway, so let’s just cut the shit. I’m baked. The show is short. Enjoy!
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39: Instacart and the Navarro Cartel, Microsoft AI Bug Catcher, LiveAid 2020 & More
April 17th, 2020 | 9 mins 43 secs
It’s Friday Y’all! In this one I talk about what Trump told us the plan was to reopen america, and it’s the same plan we already had; Instacart is delivering drugs now. Prescription drugs; Microsoft is really great at catching security and software bugs; There’s a huge global concert happening tomorrow in your home, tune in; and a beautiful dedication to Gianna Bryant and friends.
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38: What’s a Stimi Day?, SBA is Tapped Out, Amazon Makes Too Much Money and More
April 16th, 2020 | 9 mins 48 secs
Weekend’s almost here. In this one we talk about how the SBA done already ran outta money leaving small business with nothing to rely on; Some people haven’t gotten their stimulus check because they used H&R Block or Turbo Tax; Verizon is getting in on the videoconferencing game and buying BlueJeans; Facebook is cancelling all large events for 2020 and early 2021; and Amazon is selling so much they cant meet demand so they’re encouraging you to buy less.
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37: Wait, 2 Thousand What?, New iPhone!, KC Chiefs Save America and More
April 15th, 2020 | 11 mins 21 secs
It’s hump day! And Stimi Day (Stimulus check). And it’s not tax day this year. Noice! In this one, we spoke talk about a bunch of rona related economy news like the airlines’ stimulus deal, the effect it’s having on SAT and ACTs and a new bill for more money for americans; A tech company makes it easier to file for Unemployment Insurance, by going back in time; Amazon is making a killing on us, but no longer sharing as much of the wealth in affiliate programs; Apple shows it’s not scared of this virus so it dropped a new iPhone in March, the iPhone SE; and the Kansas City Chiefs not only won the Super Bowl, they might’ve helped save the West Coast and America.
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36: All Hail the King, OnePlus 8 ProT Divided by 10U Reviews, and Genitals!
April 14th, 2020 | 10 mins 2 secs
Hey. If you’re reading this. Send help.
In this one we talk about King Trump and his command over the governors of the land; North Korea is still a threat, and they’re launching missiles into the sea again; There’s a new Android phone, the OnePlus 8 and 8 Pro; You should really use unique passwords, there’s 500K of them for sale on dark web sites; and genitals! Listen to find out wtf I’m talking about -
35: Bernie Backs Biden, Bob Bounces Back and Bottle Ban? Or Bottoms Up?
April 13th, 2020 | 9 mins 42 secs
Hey. It’s Monday. In this one, Bernie fully endorses Joe Biden’s campaign. A lot faster than 2016; Disney’s Bob Iger is back running things during the ronas; Scientists did the science thing and found a new enzyme to destroy plastic bottles, but still make new ones; There’s too many damn chicken wings now. Not a problem. I’ll be back; and the NFL still plans to play this year, how they prepare for the season will be a challenge.
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34: Tócame Friday, Dark Mirror Team-Up? And our D-Bags of the Week
April 10th, 2020 | 9 mins 17 secs
It’s Friday y’all! In this one we talked about need for rubbers for Tocamé Fridays; The two big tech giants team up to track us; there’s more to do with your kids and an product; we meet our D-Bags of the Week; and no more doggies in the window, that’s a beautiful thing.
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33: SteakUmm Truth Bombs, Isaac’s an EMT! and Android Gets More Accessible
April 9th, 2020 | 11 mins
In this one we talk about the Federal Reserve ready to make it rain on the economy again; SteakUmm’s twitter account is dropping that knowledge (this MF’er spittin); Google’s Android gets more accesible with a braille keyboard; Who exactly is an essential worker? Bosses stretching the rules; and Puzzle are not only hard to finish, but difficult to make too.
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32: La Doña Will Save Us, To the Moon Alice, and Would You Like Plastic with That?
April 8th, 2020 | 9 mins 48 secs
It’s Hump Day! In this one, we updated you on Bernie’s High School Dropout; La Doña Will Save America; We called dibs on the Moon in 1969; Instacart offers preflight plans; and Mickey D’s is finally ditching some of that single use plastic.
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31: Rocket Mortgage is Big Tech Too, Baseball in Hell, and Netflix and Control ‘em
April 7th, 2020 | 8 mins 38 secs
In this one, we updated you on the rona situation aboard the USNS Comfort and in the city of Detroit; We updated our Big tech companies that are doing it big for the cause, this time Dan Gilbert and Quicken; Wisconsinites are actually voting today; MLB wants to play baseball in hell; And now you can Netflix and walk away from your kids more often with new controls.
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30: Is NY At the Apex, The Tesla Model V, and the StayAtHomeBoxOffice
April 6th, 2020 | 9 mins 37 secs
We start a new week! In this one, we updated you on the New York plateau, or apex depending on how you look at the data, Tesla comes through with a brand new model that’ll save your breath, there’s free premium tv out there for now, don’t miss out, you’re in 15% better hands with Allstate now and we catch up on this little old lady that kicked the vid’s arse.
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29: Just Wear a Mask Already, Medicare for All Trumps, and WeWork is OuttaWork
April 3rd, 2020 | 11 mins 46 secs
It’s the WEEKEND. In this one we updated you on masks. What’s the deal with those now?; Did the prez really say it’s unfair if you don’t have health Insurance; Tesla is selling cars and that’s a good thing; WeWork might be outta work soon, and How many engineers does it take to fix a ventilator?
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28: Be a Smart Parishioner, Drink To Your Heart’s Content, and Don’t Crash a Train
April 2nd, 2020 | 11 mins 16 secs
We back baby! In this one, we updated you on some of the rona news including a deranged train engineer; TSprintMo is now a thing so I hope you finally get coverage; I’d really like for church goers to be smarter than this but oh well; all while we drink a lot more during the crisis, but at least kids started a newspaper to read.
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27: T-SprintMo?, Everyone’s an Alchy Now, and Should We Cancel April’s Fools Jokes for Rona?
April 1st, 2020 | 28 secs
Wake up, wake up wake up, It’s the First of the Month! In this one we talk about Jean Lefefe’s last day at TOM; We all drinking all day err day; Don’t forget we gotta talk about the stupid rona; Did that just really happen?; and Should we cancel April Fool’s because no one’s joking?